


I'd like some love with an argument on the side

by imladrissun



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: M/M, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-11
Updated: 2019-09-10
Packaged: 2020-04-24 11:57:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19172797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imladrissun/pseuds/imladrissun
Summary: Sometimes people bring out the best in you--or the worst. Or both at once.[This is a softer look at Gabriel, without his final scenes -- a reimagining of the show.]





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I would have preferred the show to highlight how Aziraphale doesn't fit in with the other angels very much and focus on how awkward his interactions with Gabriel are throughout the years. This story presupposes that there was no gung-ho-ness about the execution of Aziraphale. Personally, I think the idea of heaven killing their own was overkill and doesn't fit in easily into canon [at least to me], so in this story that didn't happen [the book ending happened instead.]

Aziraphale was so strange, so different. In time he began to think of him more and more, to circle back to him in particular, to try to speak to him more than the others. Gabriel had realized over time that he'd never met an odder angel, and he'd met a lot of the celestial population. He had both star power and the power of his station in heaven, all of which led him to meet and greet many, many angels. 

Even when he tried to bond with him it didn't work. It made no sense. Gabriel was used to playing it cool, being sauve -- walking off and having people follow him. Angels always wanted to get in his space, talk to him. Take his advice, agree with him, praise him -- all except one. 

Aziraphale was smarter than the rest, he could tell. He had always been a lone wolf in the Beginning. There were edges of condesension in his voice sometimes, and then Gabriel knew he must have missed something. He always played it cool but Aziraphale never seemed to think he was the best. And Aziraphale never really told him the whole honest truth of what he thought or felt, just pieces and bits of things; he was always confusing. 

He wouldn't join Gabriel on a run, or in a joke, or in enthusiasm for Our Divine Father's Great Plan, or in military exercises, or in anything, really. [Other angels would practically push each other out of the way to hang out with him.] And then he had actually stopped that Plan, and Gabriel had been shocked and even more confused. How could he even think to do that, to want to, and then to actually succeed at it?! It seemed impossible.

And impressive. He'd finally put his genius to use, but directed it towards a crazy goal. 

Aziraphale did not want to talk to him, however. He left his scrolls from Heaven unopened and didn't answer any of his celestial voice messages. He never seemed to respond well to Gabriel's attempt to be overly friendly, macho buddies, fellow soldiers, or bros. Or even workout buddies.

He'd have to do something else, he thought, sitting in his home office. It was in his space, his rooms, or house as Aziraphale had said once [that was more of an Earth idea.] The Metatron had issued a new proclamation from The Almighty, basically saying that Aziraphale and the [now reconciled to The LORD] previously demonic Crowley were the goal for all angels and demons: that all beings must better themselves through learning and not let the Sin of Pride impede their learning. The angels were to embrace Earth and love Creation, while the demons were supposed to ask to be reconciled to their Creator [though only if they were sincere in their desire.]

Apparently things were changing, he thought. Michael was already having a conniption fit. If he was going to get Aziraphale to talk to him like a person and not a general, he would have to try things he liked. 

The first step was clear: sushi. 

He went to the restaurant he'd spoken to him at and had the chef make him up some. Eating was a creepy sensation at first. It was hard to control his reactions to the strange flavors. After having chopsticks -- and forks, which he then inquired about -- explained to him, he decided to eat with his hands. That was disgusting, that feeling of touching something food-like. 

Eating wasn't too fun, it was hard to time the chewing. He kind of had to choke it down. This food thing was hard to get into. Maybe he should try something else. 

He moved on to books, as that was clearly something Aziraphale had an interest in. Gabriel quickly realized he was more a man of action and a dictator of memos than he was a voracious reader. In fact, he wasn't much of a reader at all. He started with The Book, of course, but it was so focused on humanity all the time. He preferred the action scenes [and any cameos by he himself.] 

There were no two ways about it: he was going to have to pay a mortal to go into the bookshop and get him whatever Aziraphale suggested. That way he could try some things he knew he liked. Then they'd have something to talk about, and Aziraphale would be happy to respond in kind. He usually seemed like he wanted to be anywhere else. At first it had felt odd, then a tiny bit mean, and finally hurtful, because he found himself wanting his focus, his kindness, his interest.

But he could never say the right thing, could he? Aziraphale always looked askance at him. He was never good enough. He had shrugged it off at first, but then it ate at him. Why wasn't he looking at him like all the other angels did?

Current him wasn't good enough, so Gabriel was just going to have to level up. No one had ever found him wanting before, and it wasn't a feeling he liked. It was an uncomfortable new experience that spurred him into new realms, new challenges. 

They'd gotten a little closer once in a while over the years, but Aziraphale always had something to do, and eventually Gabriel realized that the other angel had someone to do it with, a rather tame excuse for a demon. They were thick as thieves, like brothers or best friends. Laughing together, going on adventures on that weird planet among all those humans. 

Now that the end of the world was not happening, the angelic world was rather in a state of shock. Since all signs from the Almighty however pointed to it's agreement with this state of affairs, that meant that Aziraphale had been --and was currently-- in the right. It was the rest of heaven that had to catch up. 

Gabriel visited him a few times afterwards on earth, but Aziraphale was even more indifferent to him than he was before. Although now with less politeness. That was kind of good, though, as it was something he could grapple with. He decided to be straightforward, it was one of his strengths after all.... though Aziraphale had roundly criticized him to his face after how he delivered the LORD's message to the Most Holy Mother of God, Mary. [One of the few humans he knew and still spoke to. She had warmed up to him in heaven after he'd visited her to apologize for how startling his appearance had been before. Aziraphale had spent a lot of time comforting her after seeing Gabriel's quote "utter embarrassment of an attempt at being a messenger. Honestly."]

That still stung, all these years later. For Aziraphale to break out of his fake civility and be real with him was both what he wanted and hard to take. When you cared about someone, their criticisms hurt much more than a regular, random angel's. And Aziraphale apparently had an inexhaustable well of problems with him. 

Gabriel had slowly come to look at himself differently after endlessly circling back to the one person who would disagree with him, push back and stand up to him. 

He'd always been more intellectual, more 'wise' than action oriented. Gabriel valued being a general over everything else, but somehow he felt drawn to Aziraphale. His different-ness stood out like a beacon in a sea of sameness. His softness. He was like a sweet blanket among swords in heaven. Gabriel didn't really know what that comfort would look like played out, but he wanted it for himself. He wanted to be looked upon and approved of.

He snuck into the bookshop after the not-end of the world and found the other angel reading an ancient scroll. He was so absorbed that he hadn't noticed him come in. [He'd materialized inside instead of moving with the two human legs he had down there. They were weird.] For once, instead of being appalled at that lack of security, of being ready and vigilent, Gabriel just felt kind of protective. 

He'd tried, before, to spend time with Aziraphale, but something always came up. In heaven or on Earth. He had to talk to him this time, he thought, he needed him to know how he felt. Even if it was hard to understand himself. "Aziraphale, I came down here to visit you," he began, squaring himself for the type of rejection he'd gotten before. The only rejection he'd ever experienced, really. That sort of thing made you stop and re-evaluate yourself. 

Aziraphale jumped around in his chair, knocking his cup of moldy cocoa right off and into the air, where it smacked Gabriel in the chest and drenched his shirt. Gabriel decided to soldier on as he stared at him, open-mouthed. "I wanted to say that I've taken your word for it and tried the sushi food items. They were kind of weird, but the dipping stuff you'd mentioned did seem to improve it. It was a new experience for me, and I'm glad I gave it a shot."

Aziraphale had finally closed his mouth but just sat there. There was no reply forthcoming, so he continued. "I also wanted to tell you the truth -- I've found you very unique, 'interesting', for a long time. I find myself feeling strong feelings about you, and wanting to spend time with you."

"What?!" he broke in, and seemed to be almost brandishing, or holding, his book like a weapon.

Gabriel had to get it out though. When he committed to a manuover, he wasn't kidding around. "I feel a connection to you, even though we are very different. I know that. It's hard for me to speak your language sometimes; when I compliment you or joke with you it's as if you're hearing something else. Well, I'm ready to learn a new language. And I know you're one of the angelic intelligentsia, so to speak."

Aziraphale put his book back down on the desk. He didn't look angry, at least, he thought. "I needed to tell you," Gabriel admitted, hastily. "I just feel this, almost 'desire', for you. It's hard to express, especially to someone so different." He paused for a moment. "No offense."

"You are brave soldier, you know that," Aziraphale said quietly, locking eyes with him. It was a little unnerving. He usually wasn't super aggressive. "But now, you've proven you have real courage, for this is something much harder...." He sighed. "I will not say that you are totally correct, but there are times when I just want to argue. To be a more honest version of myself; not that the other pieces aren't important and true just the same. Sometimes, I want someone I be aggressive with...." he admitted, speaking almost to himself.

Gabriel was a little heartened. He always gave as good as he got. He could do that, on any playing field--althought Aziraphale had often one in that of the mind. Even as an angel at home with no body Aziraphale was just gentler, more comforting than other angels. He had less fiery wheels of eyes and more extra wings. It was a weird dichotomy to be attracted to, but Gabriel knew exactly what they were. "Opposites attract," he said, full of hope. "I remember, you said that before once. When you were showing me your scroll collection on this planet in the drier lands."

Aziraphale thew up his hands. "Do you know any of the names of places down here?"

"These cities don't matter," he insisted, "they are just temporary human edifices before the end of this human experience planet. And besides, I do know a lot of them. I know lots of ones in the sandy areas, some of the ones of the ùĝ saĝ gíg ga and--" 

"Shut your mouth," Aziraphale said, exasperated, and stood up, face to face with him. "All life is sacred and we were supposed to worship all of Creation--which includes these little cities. Sometimes you make me lose my temper and be glad of it! I can't pretend you're not ridiculous when you outright act like a child," he almost fumed. 

They were nose to nose now, and he was waving a finger at him. Gabriel felt this energy spilling through him, his intangible being simply vibrated with excitement. No one fought with him in heaven. He'd never felt this type of connection with another angel. 

"This isn't my fault," Aziraphale said, as in response to the energy he was giving off--and both angels could feel it. Celestial beings can sense emotion and energy immediately. "You're just too good looking, even in your real form," and he grabbed both his arms and let their energies converge. 

As angels, they had many different ways of showing love, and this was one of the most intense. Even in this kind of passionate embrace of soul-matter, they fought there too. It just made it better. It was an ecstatic mock duel that neither wanted to be the loser in. And indeed, no one was. This type of aggression was something Aziraphale had in spades, and Gabriel hadn't expected his enthusiasm, power, or how good it would feel. They woke up later that afternoon, both physical vessel bodies on the floor. That aftermath and power had knocked their human shells out for a bit.

Gabriel turned over on the floor sluggishly, still reverberating from feeling that close to another angel, that much feeling and intensity, and caught Aziraphale's eye for a moment. "I'm still right on that last point," he croaked out before using his divine power to conjure a bottle of liquid human beverage. He gulped it down as Gabriel watched. 

"I want some," he finally ventured. Aziraphale handed him a similar cup that was already full of something that was not exactly the same color. His was red; this cup was a deep purple. He hesitantly took a sip, which was uncomfortable, because swallowing and drinking were almost off-putting in their newness to him. It was cold and sweet. Not unpleasant. "I enjoy this purple water. Is it from a body of water near here? I recall seeing the falls of water in The Garden; they were interesting." Kind of. But it was an olive branch to someone so clearly into this weird and alien planet, with its weird creatures. It was not like heaven at all. 

Aziraphale just looked at him. "You don't deserve to see Earth, it is by far the greatest part of Creation, and furthermore--" he said, and off they went. Arguing for hours. The other angel had such a different interpretation of everything: of the planet for humans, of heaven, of the point of so many things. There was little they could agree on. 

"I suppose I am free next week," Aziraphale said, begrudgingly. "Just so I can prove you wrong about that last point." They were both still on the floor. Gabriel felt exhausted, but fulfilled at the same time. Speaking with his usual cohort at home wasn't nearly as invigorating, and they certainly didn't spill over into passion. It was all business, all cool and collected, which he liked -- there. But here, it was different. Things were always different with Aziraphale. 

Things were looking up. And his shirt was almost dry from the cocoa.


	2. Chapter 2

It wasn't going very well, Gabriel reflected. He felt out of sorts, almost blue. Everything was fine except one angel's lack of good regard for him. Aziraphale was so shockingly forward, so critical. He defended himself, of course, but afterwards when he went home he couldn't get those words out his mind. Only one thing had ever judged him [that being The Almighty of course], not counting his fellow archangels, but they had always ribbed each other. 

This wasn't bonding over sparring, this was disapproval. For the first time in a long time [actually, ever] he just stayed in his office and didn't leave. Gabriel put a 'gone to sing hymns to the LORD' sign on his door and laid down on the glittering golden ground beside his desk made of giant gemstones. 

It was true that Their Parent had made Earth as an object that the angels were supposed to defend, protect, and bless. That extended to the little animal-like humans that were there. What with the whole Jesus thing, they seemed to be important -- almost at the apex of Creation itself. 

Gabriel had never really thought about it. He'd thought about Aziraphale, but not humans in general. He didn't go back down to see him for a long time [which was quite a feat in a place without linear time.] Aziraphale had gotten to him, and it hurt. He had never questioned his station before, or his purpose. 

But it did seem like he might have been a very, very small amount wrong in totally dismissing Earth as important.

The next time he visited Aziraphale's human structure dwelling [it was supposedly a 'bookshop', he knew, but he also had noticed that every time he visited no books were gone. There were simply more books. Even he was aware that 'shops' gave things away in exchange for human value objects like gold or coins or jewels. Since no books were ever gone, he assumed 'bookshop' was more of a metaphorical title. A lot of human things were like that: not what they appeared to be.]

There were even more books than last time, stacked up everywhere. Gabriel was not surprised. This time he found Aziraphale obsesively studying some old tome. "I brought you this," he said into the silence, and Aziraphale hopped right out of his chair, blinking wildly. It was a weird reaction. 

Angels didn't really act that way in Heaven. They were always aware of each other. Gabriel didn't know if it was a human-exposure going native thing or a reaction to him personally, which he tried not to think about. He didn't exactly have friends, he'd realized -- and he wanted Aziraphale as that and more. While he'd always thought of himself as popular, in the last few weeks he'd slowly come to the realization that he technically had co-workers, brother/sister soldiers or compatriots, and underlings. He didn't have a real friend. 

Aziraphale was his only honest acquaintance that he had a personal relationship with. The fawning and special treatment from everyone else seemed hollow now that he had experienced what a real personal connection felt like. Sometimes Aziraphale was even nice to him. He inevitably said or did something to change that, but for the mean time it felt a certain way that was strange -- it was almost uncomfortable, like his chest body area hurt, but he wanted to feel it again. Some part of it was also a very good feeling of elation. 

He had learned that he needed to ask Aziraphale questions to really get him to warm up to him -- he would launch into hours long explanations [with references that Gabriel didn't really get] and Gabriel really tried to sit there and listen. For him it was hard to stay so sedentary but he counseled himself: it was just like the waiting during a fight. It was important and strategic, not boring and confusing. But despite his real lack of interest in the answers to his questions, he did like hearing Aziraphale talk. 

He liked challenging him too, all up until Aziraphale would back up from him. He'd just scoot back a little sometimes, or his eyes would widen, like he thought Gabriel was going to hurt him. That hurt his feelings. Aziraphale was the only person he really liked, and it wasn't exactly like it'd be a fair fight. He was way more powerful in every way -- except in the person to person sense, where he knew Aziraphale could really hurt him with words. He could wound him in this intangible, unhealing way. It was way more dangerous than a mere corporeal cut or pain, that would linger. 

He had to show him he was on his side, he thought idly, sitting in his office upstairs. That was what Aziraphale called it sometimes. He had gotten a fish tank for his set of rooms after seeing one on Earth in a book Aziraphale was showing him. Pointing it out had not earned him any 'Earth is totally worthless, I get it' points because he'd interrupted the explanation of something he hadn't really been interested in. It was the spending time with him that he wanted, the brushing his corporeal clothed arm with his hand by accident, the 'are you paying attention' looks, the commanding tone. 

It was invigorating and made him dizzy all at once. He felt a kind of anticipation and excitement and he wanted more of it.


End file.
